Imposter Syndrome as a Black Woman: What It's Like and How I Got Past It
Imagine walking into a room and feeling inadequate, despite the fact that on paper, you have done everything that points to success or being well on your way to it. This is what imposter syndrome feels like. The National Institutes of Health defines it as “self-doubt of intellect, skills or accomplishments among high-achieving individuals.” If I am considered so ‘high-achieving,’ then why do I feel like I don’t belong?
Intersecting factors such as race, gender, and societal stereotypes make imposter syndrome a unique experience for Black women. People of color have to deal with racism and women have to deal with sexism; since I am both, a lot of times I walk into a room full of people who don’t look like me and wonder if they already have preconceived notions about who I am without even speaking to me. Of course, these feelings don’t directly correlate to the true emotions of anyone in the room, but after dealing with being put in derogatory categories in the past, a lot of times it just feels safe to assume the worst. I’m sure that many other individuals who identify as women of color can agree that it’s both uncomfortable and nerve-wracking to feel the constant need to prove yourself. This double bias often intensifies the imposter syndrome that so many people are familiar with.
In any public setting, whether that's in the classroom, workplace, or social settings, it doesn’t help that women of color are often underrepresented to begin with. Countless times I have walked into the room and been ‘the only.’ This isolation causes women like myself to overperform and overwork beyond realistic means. This perfectionism trap can not only worsen the imposter syndrome but also lead to burnout in what could’ve been a dream job or position. Imposter syndrome can happen to even the most successful individuals; no one is alone. Even Viola Davis, an award-winning actress, has said that sometimes things still don’t feel quite right. She said in an interview, "I still feel like I'm going to wake up and everybody's going to see me for the hack I am.” Obviously, Viola Davis is far from a “hack,” but somehow she can’t help but feel like an imposter at times.
Each year of my college experience, I have put effort into getting more involved in groups and organizations around campus surrounding my major and other areas of interest. My biggest hesitation was my level of discomfort walking into the first meeting. I was afraid to speak up because I didn’t know if anyone would care to listen, and I didn’t want to share my opinions out of fear that people would disagree. Luckily, I have been fortunate enough to evolve past these initial feelings by working on my confidence and believing in my abilities in every room I walk into.
It’s not my job to manage my feelings and someone else’s. I have learned that self-deprecation doesn’t make the situation any less uncomfortable, so I might as well believe the fact that I’m in the room for a reason. The best piece of advice I have ever received was to start doubting your doubt because it's probably wrong anyway. Surround yourself with communities of individuals that uplift and support you. Always remember that although your feelings are valid, so are your qualifications. More than likely, others are seeing you in a light that is way brighter than the one you see yourself in.
About Melia
Melia is a senior at Grand Valley State University majoring in journalism, broadcasting and digital media with a minor in advertising and public relations. Melia has held quite a variety of internships from being a marketing intern with GVSU athletics to being a news intern at WOODTV8 and now being a PR intern for the Grand Rapids Gold G-league nba team! (Her favorite so far!). Melia hopes to learn even more about the world of PR while working as an account executive for GrandPR. Upon graduation, Melia hopes to do something in the sports and entertainment industry!